The Solemnization (The Nikah)

And so, the long-awaited day finally arrived.

Woke up in the morning feeling like P Diddy a zombie, had my last mandi pagi as a single woman (squeeeee!) and waited for my photographers, videographers and make-up artist (MUA) to arrive.

While waiting, aku pun sempat ah gobble down lontong from the makan makan session the night before (appetite still intact, y'all) and sempat post this countdown screenshot on good old Instagram:

You know, I didn't really feel ervous or anxious during the days leading up to the wedding - whenever people asked, I'd say the obligatory "Yeah, I'm nervous!" or "Yeah, I'm anxious!" but I don't think the jitters truly, truly hit me until I opened up my house door that morning and saw the guys from CST Singapore arrive. The thought that ran through my mind the minute I saw them was "This is IT, Farna. This is the day your life changes forever!!!!!"

But before the jitters could settle down, my MUA arrived and so did Bliss! All of them went straight to their work, of course, and two hours later, I saw my pengantin self in the mirror for the first time. And my first thought was:

"ZOMG WHY THE MAKE UP SO CANTIK ONE?! IF AKU PENGSAN FROM HAPPINESS NOW MASIH SEMPAT PERGI NIKAH TAK AKU NI?!"

Hahahahaha AH YE sekarang boleh lah aku ketawa eh. Cuba kalau really happen. Telan balek sak aku punya ketawa, simpan buat perhiasan.

I think those who are on my MUA's Facebook would have seen this picture on my wedding day:

I don't know how she did it but it was just... PURE MAGIC LAH OKAY.

Would really love to gush somemore but this is not the time yet, I will give my full review in a separate entry! But let's just say lepas dah nampak diri sendiri macam gitu, I was sungguh psyched and raring to gooooooo ah. Hehe.

EXCITEZ WRITTEN ALL OVER MA FACE~ Y'ALLZ

Arrived at the venue right on schedule after which my dulang girls and I lined up outside the hall, and I was relaxed enough to take it that everything was going according to plan. Of course, it was at this juncture that my supermother decided to come out and have this conversation with me:

Supermother: "Ana, berkat belum sampai tau, macam mane ni?"

Me: "BERKAT BELUM SAMPAI?!"

Supermother: "A'ah. Bunga rampai pun belum sampai."

Me: "BUNGA RAMPAI BELUM SAMPAI?!"

SYABAS. 

Background story: We'd already received the bunga rampai containers that we ordered from Ola Lola the night before but since our order was for containers only, actual bunga rampai leaves NOT included, we made separate arrangements to get the bunga rampai leaves ourselves. 

My aunt's sister-in-law has a shop in Joo Chiat which sells bunga rampai leaves so I was actually prepared to get them from her, but my mamat insisted on another arrangement so I thought well, okay, let's just go with that then. 

Guess that decision turned out to be the wrong one because that other arrangement was late and the bunga rampai containers were not ready by the time we wanted to walk in for the solemnization (Our middle siblings were assigned to carry the basket of bunga rampai for each side for the pre-solemnization walk-in). 

Nasib baik my aunts were all ready at the guest reception table and helped to speed-pack the bunga rampai leaves into its containers once the leaves came and finished them in time for post-solemnization distribution! The favours for both sides came shortly after too so that turned out fine in the end. Phew!

Some (unofficial) pictures now:

Me, caught on camera receiving news about the missing-in-action bunga rampai and favours from my supermother hahahahaha (Ya now I laugh):

Me, caught on camera chatting with Zahrin from Kasai Sayang about god knows what. And Kak Nora caught uploading pictures on Facebook?! Muahahaha:

Me, caught on camera trying to sort out the problem of the sireh dara that was too big and heavy for any of the girls to carry:

Me, caught on camera asking my kakak sedara to help inform the photographers and videographers that we were ready to walk into the hall hahahahaha:

EH BUSY PE PENGANTIN YANG MINUTES AWAY FROM HER NIKAH NI.

Of course nothing else mattered by the time we walked in!

All photos from this point hereon were taken by our official photographers Bliss Photocinema (And yes, we've received our official wedding photos, guys, and it's only been three weeks since the wedding! Bet Speedy Gonzales was the one who worked on our photos...)

Note: Quality and resolution of photos reduced to be uploaded into Blogger. The quality and resolution of photos are much, much, much better in their original form.

My precious dulang girls! 

Consists of 4 bridesmaids, 2 sisters and 1 favourite cousin <3

Seconds later, it was the dulang boys' turn to walk into the hall...

 4 groomsmen, 2 brothers and 1 favourite cousin as well <3

Ceremony started with our wakils exchanging pleasantries but the exchange happened for about 5, 10 minutes only, I think?! Because I remember glancing at the big wall clock at the back of the hall cun cun at 10.00am then glancing towards the door right after... and seeing Ustaz Mohd Khair striding in.

Right on schedule!

I didn't think it was possible for me to love this tok kadi of ours more than I already do <3

My husband-to-be (at that time) listening intently to Ustaz Mohd Khair, who is his most favourite ustaz in the whole wide worlddddd, giving his sermon.

I can see why my mamat fangirls over Ustaz Mohd Khair, which led to him being our #1 choice of tok kadi by the way (story here) - there is just something about his entire being that makes you feel very calm and composed (you can see him in action in one of the videos which I posted here)

And the fact that both of us love his sermon during nikah proceedings helps - his sermon is awesome (we have the same favourite line from his sermon, which we've heard from another nikah that he officiated), he keeps it short and simple, his voice is fantastic, he has a very calming aura and he is... very easy on the eyes hahahahaha.

I still remember my heart fluttering when I heard our favourite line being delivered by Ustaz Khair ever so effortlessly and within the next few minutes, I heard him say the most anticipated line for the day: "Aku nikahkan kau..."

I might have held my breath for a bit until Saliheen habis lafaz, which he did just as... effortlessly.

And that was it - we were married. We are now husband and wife.

I don't know if I'm just biased (OH MAYBE I AM, SO SUE ME DAMNIT) but I loved Saliheen's lafaz of the akad nikah. It was exactly everything that I would have wanted him to do - he used 'Aku', he said out the mas kahwin amount (instead of 'tersebut') and he said the lafaz in one single breath (no pauses yay!) - and he did it without even me having to tell him beforehand how I would have preferred it to sound. Couldn't help but feel an overwhelming sense of pride swell inside me after he finished his lafaz :,)

You can watch him take the akad nikah in this lovely short video which my awesome baby sister did as a little surprise for us :,)

(And please don't get me wrong - as long as the lafaz is coherent and recognized by the two witnesses and tok kadi, and most importantly, asalkan betul di sisi agama and diberkati in the eyes of our Almighty, that is all that is needed. Even if Saliheen had done it differently, it would have been okay and I would have still loved him the same - and still wanted to marry him! - for who he is and everything that he has done for us. But it was just very lovely and very heartwarming to hear Saliheen doing the akad nikah in the exact way that I would have loved it to be, you know?)

I also love the fact that Ustaz Mohd Khair asked our two witnesses for their acknowledgement (the "sah" part) immediately after, said "Alhamdullilah" and everyone raised their hands up for the doa. We've been to solemnizations where the tok kadi cracks a joke right after the lafaz and that is something which we wouldn't have wanted.

Saliheen probably looking excited because he finally got to meet his favourite Ustaz in person again, and not because he was already married to me hahahahaha WHAT A FANGIRL FREAK

We then had a series of phototaking with our families and orang orang kuat as well as individual and couple shots which both of us absolutely hated doing hahahahahaha. You see - my mamat and I are NOT the romantic and the mushy mushy sort so we get crazy embarassed and crazy awkward when asked to take huggy huggy kissy kissy couple shots! Yelchhhhh!

Of course the pictures didn't turn out tooooooo bad in the end, but I think we'll keep those for our own future reference instead eh :P

WE'RE HUSBAND AND WIFE NOW, SUCKERS!!!!!!! :D

******************************

You know, months before the wedding, I had some people asking me a question - "Will you cry during nikah?" 

To be honest, I didn't know what to expect and couldn't really answer that ~burning~ question. You see, I've never really been a crier - I laugh or make useless observations during supposedly sad emotional scenes, and I don't cry during Hari Raya mornings while seeking forgiveness or while watching wedding videos like some of my friends - so while I didn't expect to cry during my wedding... you can never know with this sort of ceremony, right?

As it turns out... aku memang tak nangis punya orang dah. Hahahahaha.

I did, however, smile and laugh till my jaws hurt.

In fact, that's all I wanted to do throughout the solemnization ceremony - smile and laugh and smile and laugh somemore because I was so... happy.

I was happy to see our families and close friends gathered together, I was happy to see everyone dressed in their baju melayu best, I was happy to know they took the time and effort to come witness, bless and celebrate our occasion, I was happy to see all the pretty decorations around me, I was happy to see the man I've been wanting to marry for the past 5 years finally sitting next to me as my lawfully wedded husband. I was just... so happy.

I know the tears that people cry during weddings are tears of overwhelming happiness but I guess that's just the kind of people Saliheen and I are? We're not the sort of people who cry or even tear during happy occasions - not even those of happiness or pride - we're always out to goof around, we seek for fun and laughter, and we regard every gathering, every party, every event with our loved ones as an opportunity to give and receive smiles and laughter, and we strive to make as much merry as we can - and I love that this is just one of the many things that Saliheen has in common with me.

It's comforting, really, knowing that this was the man I married that fateful Saturday morning.

oh hai, tok kadi! (part ll)

 After I wrote yesterday's entry about tok kadi booking, I thought that was the end of it.

Saliheen and I had accepted that our #1 choice tok kadi Ustaz Mohd Khair is not available on our wedding date so we decided on Ustaz Mohd Suhaimi instead - what else is there to it except wait for our wedding day to see our tok kadi in person, right?

So I blogged about our experience, continued doing my work, left office at the end of the day and went home. Same old, same old, right? Well, not quite. Because one hour and a half later, I received this notification in my email inbox:

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 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW RIDICULOUSLY EXCITED I WAS????? 

But obviously not as excited as my mat because when I called to tell him about the turn of events, he started shrieking and insisting that we apply for change of solemnizer on the ROMM website now now NOW -____- 

Dude refused to listen to me when I told him to call Ustaz Mohd Khair the next morning first to ask whether it really is possible SO to shut him up, I opened up the Change Solemnization Details application on ROMM website to do the necessary. Realized I couldn't do it because Ustaz Mohd Khair tak bukak any slots for November 2013 so my mat was forced to calm the eff down and wait until the next morning to ask the Ustaz.

Sooooo earlier today, my mat called Ustaz Mohd Khair to inform him that our wedding will be on a public holiday and asked whether he will be working... to which he laughed and said no, and told us to give him five minutes to open up a slot for us.

Five minutes later...

(Click image to enlarge)

 YAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!

Now we not only can haz a tok kadi, we CAN HAZ OUR #1 CHOICE TOK KADI!!!!!

Sure, we had to pay $15 for making a change to our application but what is $15 as compared to having Ustaz Mohd Khair, who is our #1 choice tok kadi, preside at our nikah proceedings?!?!?! Definitely worth more than a mere $15, if you ask us. Woohoo!

Oh, but can someone tell my mamat not to be such a freak and hantar this kind of text:

Wahlau, must declare love and fangirlism segala...

But lolz aside, we really must give special thanks to Sis Haida actually - thank you so so so much because if not for your comment, we wouldn't have made the move to try asking Ustaz Mohd Khair again whether he can open up his slot on our wedding date.

And of course, all praises to the Al-Mighty for giving us this rezeki, Alhamdullilah! This is yet another incident that strengthens our faith in Qada and Qadar - you see, my mat and I were pretty bummed when Deepavali was changed from 3rd November 2013 (Sunday) to 2nd November 2013 (Saturday) because that change meant we wouldn't have a public holiday on Monday and will have to apply leave for Monday instead. 

Little did we know, that change turned out to be a momentous blessing in disguise - now that Deepavali (public holiday) is on our wedding date, Ustaz Khair can be our solemnizer when he wouldn't be able to do so if it was on any other working Saturday mornings.

Never fails to amaze us how God will give us our rezeki if it is indeed meant to be ours.

oh hai, tok kadi!

WE CAN HAZ A TOK KADI, Y'ALLZ.

Dah tengok wedding videos berlongok longok and dah list down nama tok tok kadi segala in this entry, and now we've already gotten ourselves a tok kadi!!! Alhamdullilah!

Actually kan dulu dulu masa time baru berjinak jinak dengan wedding preparations, my mat always cakap dia nak consider Ustaz Firdaus Yahya because his parents kenal his mother whereas I was kind of hoping to realize the dream of having Kadi Hassan because he was the tok kadi who solemnized my parents. But as fate would have it, we met Ustaz Mohd Khair at our kursus rumahtangga, my mat identified him as the person who made him cry with his powerful khutbah at Masjid Al-Falah once upon a time and both of us fell in love with his voice after looking through wedding videos with him in them.

Which was why Ustaz Mohd Khair ended up as our #1 choice for tok kadi.

So my mat called Ustaz Mohd Khair yesterday afternoon to give him a heads up about wanting to book him during our online registration later that night but ALAS! He informed us that he can only do solemnizations after 2pm on Saturdays because he needs to be at work at Masjid Sultan on Saturday mornings!!! The only way we can go around it is to have our solemnization at Masjid Sultan itself so he can get back to work right after our nikah but we agreed that option is not possible because of logistics issues :(

We're reaaaaally bummed because both of us really really really like Ustaz Mohd Khair + his voice and delivery is freaking awesome but this is one of those things that we just have to write off as not our rezeki.

Cuma rasa macam very cruel lah kan, kalau while waiting for midnight to submit our online application on ROMM website, I gatal pergi tertengok video ni:

Hanafee + Liza_The Actual Day (Highlights) from rizal amir khan on Vimeo.

USTAZ KHAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIRRRRRRR VAI U DO THIZ TO UZ VAIIIII

Tak tau nak nangis sebab tengok wedding orang yang sungguh cantik atau nak nangis tengok Ustaz Khair dalam wedding video ni lah kan sebenarnye hahahahahahaha

Aaanyway~~~ There is a good reason why kita ada list kan kan kan??? Untuk tackle situasi situasi macam gini lah ye, my friends. So my mat and I pun move along and went down our list - our choice #2 is Ustaz Mohd Suhaimi!

Very simple reasons why he is choice #2, really:

(1) He was the tok kadi for Sham and Aisyah's wedding and my mat finds himself comfortable with Ustaz Mohd Suhaimi (plus Sham is very chummy with him because they went for a course together before);

(2) He stays in Tampines (3 streets away from me! If kita nikah at my place, dia boleh jalan kaki je seh hehehe) sooooo he should be familiar with our venue which is located in the East. It's been recommended to choose a tok kadi who stays near to your solemnization venue so lesser chance of the tok kadi getting lost along the way and being late for your solemization; and

(3) We like how he sounds when he does the akad and the khubah as well - you can refresh by watching Fiza O and KC's wedding video here.

(It was either Ustaz Mohd Suhaimi or Ustaz Nor Razak Bakar actually, the latter did Azmin and Nat's solemnization and comes highly recommended by Miza, my long-time online friend who was the same person who recommended us Maldives resorts for our honeymoon.)

Sham, our ever so helpful and resourceful wak kahwing kahwing, texted Ustaz Mohd Suhaimi during lunchtime yesterday to give him a heads up before my mat called him lepas kerja (after establishing that there is no way we can get Ustaz Mohd Khair to be our tok kadi.) Ustaz Suhaimi immediately gave us his word that he will block the slot for us so that called for a yippie yay! Takde hek takde hok, settle the kettle, ok get set go.

Waited until midnight to do the online registration -  here are some screenshots from the registration page! I've always wondered how it looks like because you cannot reach this page until you dah confirm and masukkan all the details ma hahaha so this is for those kaypoh people like me who pernah wonder how it looks like:

Remember to click on images to enlarge images for better viewing!

 There's a drop down list of tok kadi names for us to choose from...

OH HAI our tok kadi who lives 3 streets away from me! :D

Raya nanti saya datang passing lauk pauk and kuih muih ok Ustaz hehehehehe

Click on your solemnization date and then choose the time block that you want - available slots start from 10.00am until 10.00pm. (Dah macam operating hours untuk shopping malls lah pulak.)

Siape perangai kurang ajar, sila lah pilih slot untuk nikah at 10 malam ok.

Made payment for registration fees of S$39.00 and we're done and good to go!

It was easy, quick and painless to use the online registration portal - the next thing for us to do is to report to the Registry with my wali pulak!

(Click to enlarge image)

My mat, my wali (hey daddy!) and I have already taken leave and blocked the date where we can all go to ROMM so definitely looking forward to that!!!!! At first I thought we can only go to the Registry strictly 5 weeks before our solemnization date aje seh BUT thanks to the awesome kakak-kakak kahwing network and this entry from Raudah of Seven Twelve Thirteen, I got confirmation that we can go anytime after we've registered online as long as it is at least 5 weeks before solemnization date.

And with that.......... 150 DAYS TO GO, PEOPLE.

P.S. We realized 5 minutes before our online registration that our wedding is on a public holiday (thanks to his supermother who reminded us!), which means there is a chance Ustaz Mohd Khair might not have to go to work on that day after all. But we weren't sure whether mosques and Islamic organizations follow secular public holidays and didn't want to risk waiting until the next day to call him again to ask, which was why we went ahead with Ustaz Mohd Suhaimi instead.

P.P.S Sorry to our friends and families who were hoping we'd take good-looking Ustaz Syakir Pasuni! I was open to having him but my mat refused and bantah keras keras because he says "I tak nak our tok kadi to be more handsome than me, I AM THE GROOM, OUR TOK KADI CANNOT BE MORE HANDSOME THAN ME!"

WHATEVZ, PLEASE. Kadang kadang aku memang sayang ah dengan ini mamat but kadang kadang MACAM MINTAK KENA BANTAI SAK.

[Editted as at 7 June 2013, 2:15pm - the story on tok kadi continues here.]

oh embun, oh two, oh lola!

For those who were asking for pictures of Versari Ade's bridal outfits presented at Jentayu Gallery's Wedding Exhibition a few weeks ago, make sure you hop hop hopping over to Versari Ade's Facebook because they've posted some on Facebook already! Hehe.

Some pictures from their Embun collection:

(Source: Versari Ade)

Wahlauweh. Cannot wait to go through the racks of Versari Ade now lor. 

Three more months (to our outfit selection) ok guys!!! :O :O :O

(Jentayu Gallery has also posted official pictures of the wedding exhibition on their Facebook so remember to go check them out.)

And since I'm here, can I just express my heartiest congratulations to my chosen invitation card designer 'From Fran With Love' for hitting her first thousand 'likes' on Facebook?!!! Just in time for anniversary lagi ok! You all boleh dapat 10% off promo sempena FFWL's anniversary ok!

(Source: From Fran With Love)

Wheeeee!!! (I wheeeee untuk you all ok, because I dah tak boleh wheeeee for myself sebab dah book From Fran With Love in April gitu so tak dapat lah this promo. Hur hur.)

Anyway, anyway.

Finally bought the last maha last barang dulang last weekend and we finally got down to business - took measurements and pictures of our barang barang dulang and compiled them together with information on our chosen colours and theme into one Microsoft Word document before sending it over to Ola Lola. 

Here is a picture of my mat tengah semangat ambik gambar one of the barang dulang, siap dengan lampu spotlight segala hahahahahaha:

YAY, SETTLE! Really glad we eventually decided on the same (awesome) service provider for both our dulang gubahan because it makes things sooooo much more easier lor.

Oh, we also took the time to watch videos of all the tok tok kadi doing their thing for akad nikah in the videos listed in one of my previous entries and he has already listed down his Top 5 tok kadi choices - will only know our luck and fate in the next two days so I'll be back with news! Sit tight, guys.

hey mister tok kadi!

Exactly one more week to booking our Tok Kadi!!! SAY WHAAATTTTTTT :O

My mat has been bugging me to show him videos of various Tok Kadi in action so he can finally decide which Tok Kadi he wants for our nikah haiz so I'm just going to dump this whole load of wedding videos for him to pelan pelan kayuh tengok eh.

[Note: If I can't find videos, then I will put up pictures of the Ustaz instead.]

  Ustaz Nor Razak Bakar

Azmin & Natasha | 0430 Hrs - Same Day Edit from Amir Nasir Cinematography on Vimeo.

Ustaz Pasuni Maulan

Elfian and Noorizan from Amir Nasir Cinematography on Vimeo.

Badrul and Ayuni from Amir Nasir Cinematography on Vimeo.

 

  Ustaz Abdul Aziz Bin Mohamed


Fahmie and Azean - Wedding Trailer from Amir Nasir Cinematography on Vimeo.

Ustaz Firdaus Bin Yahya


Amin & Thahirah Wedding Highlights from Amir Nasir Cinematography on Vimeo.

Ustaz Hassan Bin Salim


Shahril + Salina_The Actual Day (Highlights) from rizal amir khan on Vimeo.


Sarhan & Farhanah Highlights from Amir Nasir Cinematography on Vimeo.

Ustaz Ismail Bin Terimoh


Ezrein Shah & Siti Hajrah - Same Day Edit from Amir Nasir Cinematography on Vimeo.


Ustaz Mohamad Yazid Bin Yunos


Kamaruzaman and Siti Norazra from Amir Nasir Cinematography on Vimeo.

Ustaz Mohamed Khair Bin Rahmat


Shahril + Suherdlya_The Actual Day (Highlights) from rizal amir khan on Vimeo.

Ustaz Muhammad Zahid Bin Mohd Zin


Erwan and Marinah from Amir Nasir Cinematography on Vimeo.

Ustaz Noor Bin Rawi


Khairul Adli & Siti Nuraidah - Same Day Edit from Amir Nasir Cinematography on Vimeo.


Rudi + Hazliana_The Actual Day (Highlights) from rizal amir khan on Vimeo.


Sharul + Fyza_The Actual Days (Highlights) from rizal amir khan on Vimeo.

Ustaz Sallim Bin Jasman


Kamal & Dahlia Wedding Highlights from Amir Nasir Cinematography on Vimeo


Basril & Mariam Wedding Highlights from Amir Nasir Cinematography on Vimeo.

Ustaz Syakir Bin Pasuni

Don+Octavia | Wedding Highlights from Diziq Vidz motion pictures on Vimeo.

Ustaz Mohammed Suhaimi Bin Mohamed Fauzi

FizaO & DJ KC Solemnization from CST SINGAPORE on Vimeo.

Ustaz Mohammad Irwan Shah Bin Sudirman

Khairul+Natasha | Wedding Highlights from Diziq Vidz motion pictures on Vimeo.

Kadi Syed Ahmad bin Syed Mohamed


Wayne & Nadia Wedding Highlights from Amir Nasir Cinematography on Vimeo.


Sara & Isyrafz : Majlis Pernikahan Highlights from CST SINGAPORE on Vimeo.

Ustaz Mokson Bin Mahori

Ustaz Syed Mustafa Bin S Ja'afar Alsagoff

Ustaz Mohd Ibrahim Bin s/o Mohd Kassim

 (middle)

Ustaz Maarof Bin Haji Mohamad

(Credit: Pictures are all from the lovely Basheerah of The Hope Fulfilled!!! Thank you sooooo much for helping me to dig your extensive photo encyclopedia of all these Ustaz Ustaz :P)

Ustaz Husin Bin Adam

(Credit: Ok this one's from Shidah of Fluffy Prata. Thank you pengantin baru!!! :D)

Ustaz Muhammad Tarmizi Bin Abdul Wahid

You can't hear him but you can see him in action here.

 

Thank you to bride Shahirah for providing Ustaz Tarmizi's picture and information! :D

Can't seem to find videos for the Tok Kadis listed below so I'll just leave their names here and edit this entry again as and when I can find out how they look like and which wedding videos they appear in. Kalau siape siape ada the link, tolak sini sikit eh! Hehe.

Ustaz Mohamad Yusof Bin Sa'ad

Ustaz Ya'acob Bin Ishak

This is a decision that has to be made when we meet this weekend so tak terkial kial when we menghadap in front of our laptop next week to make our Tok Kadi selection! Already got both of our saksi punya details ready so we're good to go once we can narrow down a few Tok Kadis into our own preference list. But for now, aku nak pergi tidur dulu because aku sesungguhnya dah pening eh tengok wedding videos satu malam GOOD NIGHT!

permintaan pelik bin ajaib

My mat read one of my latest entries which has pictures of henna stains last night and the first thing he asked me was:

Mat: B, nanti kita kahwin you kena pakai inai eh?

Me: Depends lah. I don’t mind kalau tak pakai. But if our parents want me to pakai inai then I pakai sikit lah. Just a simple design will do…

Mat: Oh… rasa rasa kalau you buat inai design dragon boleh tak? Design ikan koi ke… 
… gasak kau lah mat.

(This, coming from the same person who once asked me whether he can sit on a beanbag instead of a cushion for akad nikah.

Yes. Dude wants to sit on a bean freaking bag. For akad freaking nikah.

And if that’s not enough, he wants the tok kadi to sit on a bean bag as well.

Hai lepak susah betul lah hidup kalau nak kahwin dengan badut.)