selamat hari raya! bila nak kahwin?

So cepat sepantas kilat kita dah sampai to the last few days of Ramadhan!

Some of my pengantin-to-be friends who are getting married this year dah start saying emosi things like "This year aku nya last Ramadhan and Hari Raya as single" and "This year last Ramadhan dapat sahur with own family" "This year last Raya dapat bangun pagi Raya with family" *dada sebak hempas badan ke katil with tears rolling down the eyes cue lagu sayu berdayu dayu* etc etc etc.

All that next year baru I will start to say and feel but for now, I can finally give a true blue answer to those pesky "Bila nak kahwin?" questions bila Raya visiting already!!!!!

"Insya Allah tahun depan, cik!!!!! Doa kan je lah!"

I'm also planning to add: "Cik ada nak sponsor ape ape tak???" Hahahahaha

You know, I used to mock the "Bila nak kahwin?" questions but now that I think about it... it's not exactly the makcik pakcik punya salah, you know.

I mean, look, they don't exactly have the same interests or the same wavelength as us and seriously, what else is there to ask other than your future plans? (Besides the remeh temeh stuff like whether you bought or tailored your baju Raya and how many kuih muih you buat or beli this year.) I know future plans can be other things like career progression, future travels around the world, plans for further studies, etc but marriage is - whether you like it or not - a "natural" process for those in their twenties in the eyes of society, especially the Malay one. So it is only natural that they will ask what are your plans for that aspect of your life, yes?

Kalau you the sort yang belum ada plans nak kahwin, all you can do is smile, muster some kind of mumbled reply and envision shoving a botol of kuih tart down their throats in your mind ah. Hahahahaha. Kalau takut botol kuih tart tak muat, takpe, pasu bunga belakang sofa pun sesuai digunakan ye tuan tuan dan puan puan.

Back when I hit 20 and marriage was not even on the cards since I just started working, the questions were already flying fast and furious from every makcik and every pakcik from every nook and cranny. Some of my favourite replies:

"Bila bila pun boleh, cik, cuma tunggu cik sponsor je ni" / "Cik nak sponsor ke???"

"Maybe minggu depan, cik jangan lupa datang eh"

"Belum cukup umur, cik. Seluar dalam saya pun mak saya masih cuci kan"

"Insya Allah lagi sepuluh tahun, cik"

"Belum ada jodoh, cik. Cik kenalkan saya dengan anak cik lah" (I once used this on my mum's friend who had a hot abang mok as her anak hahaha)

Ok lah sempena bulan yang mulia ini, I nak wish "Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri" to all my Muslim friends, "Maaf Zahir Batin" to everyone yang pernah feel offended by my entries as well as "All The Best!" to the following groups of people:

- All you singles or you couples yang dah lama in relationship but no marriage plans yet yang kena battle "Bila nak kahwin?" questions;

- All you married people yang kena battle "Bila nak ada baby?" questions; and

- All you married people anak satu yang kena battle "Bila nak ada second baby?" questions this coming Raya!

Next up after Raya season - MUSIM ORANG KAHWIN! Haiz tak kurus kurus lah aku macam gini.